Addiction of Another Sort
by Nayeri
Summary: Harry cannot seem to quit cutting, despite his new abilities as a Natural Animagus. Can Severus save him from his self-destructive habits, or is something finally beyond even his capabilities? Runner SideStory, non-slash. (This story has been abandoned and is up for adoption. See Inside)
1. Obsession

(Author's note: Okay, I meant to finish MtMtE before I wrote further in the Runner's series, but something someone said got under my skin: Harry would not have stopped cutting as easily as I showed in Runner. As I wanted to concentrate more on both the alcohol and the adventure, I left his cutting habit short some. So, in answer to someone's request that his cutting be explored more thoroughly, on we go!)

Harry woke with a jerk as the second nightmare of the week came to its disturbing conclusion. Grumbling, he scrubbed his face with his hands, as he automatically blocked his connection to Draco for the time being. His Bond-Mate was deeply asleep, fighting his own battles, though they were more in the adventure side than true nightmares.

Feeling just a tad envious of the other teen's ability to turn nightmares into something he could fight, Harry slipped out of bed and padded to his trunk. Opening it silently, he grimaced as he noted idly that his liquor store was gone, as his knives had been since he had come to Snape Manor. Gripping his hands into fists, he sighed with minor relief when his nails cut into his palms. It wasn't enough though; he needed to find something to cut with.

Sitting down so his legs wouldn't strain too much, he began to puzzle his brain for a solution. He couldn't use his potion knife, as there was no telling what kind of toxin remained on the blade even with frequent washing. He could use his pen knife, if he made sure to sterilize it first. Or he could find something he could break and use as a sharp edge. He decided on the pen knife, as it was the simplest and quickest means of cutting.

He began searching for the pen knife, only to realize that it must have been taken as well. Cursing under his breath, he took out his Invisibility Cloak, which Professor Snape had not confiscated oddly enough. Putting it on, he crept out of his room, and to the stairs, using the skills of his Animagus form to move silently. Standing at the top, he concentrated on his magic, issuing it to act like a Locator spell. He was glad that he was the only one awake, it being 2:30 AM and all, otherwise the trail of light would have given him away.

He followed the trail downstairs, being careful to hold onto the railing through the Cloak. What with his attention split between spell and being quiet, he didn't have the energy to spare to make sure he didn't fall down the steps. He let go of the railing as his feet touched the bottom of the staircase. He then continued on his way to the sitting room, looking about to allow his eyes the chance to absorb everything they could.

The room was empty, of that he had no doubt. The only sound of breathing he heard was his own, which was so light that even he barely heard it. He grimaced when he saw the light led directly to the Professor's desk. It was the one place neither he, nor Draco, were allowed to go through without permission. He was going to have to think of something to get his knives without setting off whatever alarms there likely were.

He then remembered something he had learned just last year, and he concentrated on his magic again. Turning off the Locator spell, which was beginning to drain him anyways, he began to wandlessly summon one of his special knives.

He heard the handle smack against the drawer wall a couple of times, before he pushed a full dose of magic to make it insubstantial for a few seconds. A minute after he started summoning the knife, he had it in hand though he was swaying with the effort it took just to obtain it. While he was a powerful wizard, he had yet to learn how to extend his constitution, and thus drained his magic far too quickly while attempting wandless spells.

Holding still for a moment, he concentrated on building up his magic reserves to a level that he could move without fainting. Once that was achieved, he slipped back upstairs on quiet feet, holding the knife in a position that it wouldn't get in the way. It was only when he was back in his room sitting by his trunk did he relax. Getting his last magic restorative out of his trunk, he drank it down quickly. He then headed for the bathroom after making sure that he was _not_ going to be interrupted again.

Sitting in the shower with a small light globe by his side, he fingered the knife's edge lovingly. He hadn't needed to use this for a while now, but the last nightmare had been too much for even his coping abilities. Removing his shirt, he eyed the scars with the paw-print mark between them. He swallowed convulsively as memories assaulted him once again, threatening to break down his shields. Growling under his breath, he arranged the knife into a more convenient position.

Falling into a sort of trance, he slowly, and with great precision cut shallowly into the old scars, only stopping when the blood was gathered at the cuts. Once both sides glinted dark red with fresh blood, he cleaned off the knife and focused on the feeling of numbness as well as control. He had missed this, even with his Animagus abilities. The liquor had helped, somewhat, but it was this shameful secret that allowed him the control he needed. He just hoped that Professor Snape wouldn't find out that he had reobtained his knife, otherwise he was going to catch it.

Concentrating on the wounds, he healed them with the old speed, and then cleaned them off. Getting up, he put his shirt back on, and headed into his room again. Putting the knife away in a hidden compartment of his trunk, he turned out the light globe, and went to bed. He would be able to sleep now, his mind numbed towards memories good and bad for the moment.

(End Author's note: Okay, this is during August just after New Route. This will be a chaptered story, though likely not as long as Runner was. Please R&R and tell me if this is realistic or not.)


	2. Severus Finds Out

(Author's note: Okay, so I haven't updated this for months. So sue me. Anyway, this chapter is going to entirely in Severus' PoV. Now, without further ado, on we go.)

_Last time:_

_He would be able to sleep now, his mind numbed towards memories good and bad for the moment._

The six o'clock rays of sun found Severus getting ready for another day. He made sure to dress in some of his more flame-proof clothing, as he had obligations to finish stocking the Hospital Wing's shelves. With only a couple of weeks left, time was fast running out for that obligation to be filled.

Thus it was with a determined mind that he made his way down to the kitchen, his morning ablutions finished. He was somewhat surprised to see that Harry wasn't up, even if it wasn't his turn to make breakfast. Usually the raven-haired boy was up before the Potions Master by at least fifteen minutes. Still, Severus wasn't unduly worried yet, as he hoped that the boy sleeping in a little meant that he'd had a good night's rest.

He started making the breakfast (French toast with bananas) when he heard the kitchen door opening. He didn't stop cooking, though, even when Draco sidled up to help him plate the pieces of toast. Neither one said anything, working in comfortable silence until they were both sitting at the kitchen table, enjoying the mildly sweet breakfast, and their morning wake-me-up cup (coffee for Severus, orange juice for Draco).

Once they had both waken up enough to converse, Severus asked quietly "Where is Harry this morning?" He had long since dropped the more formal names for the boys, as it didn't make sense to continue calling them by their last names. Particularly Harry, as it helped Severus separate him from his father.

Severus was stirred out of his contemplation by Draco saying "Still asleep, and likely to remain there for at least another hour if his mental rhythms are anything to go by." Severus was surprised again, that Harry would be sleeping in that late.

Shrugging it off as him worrying too much, Severus said "I have some paperwork to finish. When your BondMate awakes, make sure he gets some breakfast, and warn him that we are going to be working on a new potion today." Once Draco gave his consent, Severus finished his breakfast, and headed for his study. He truly did have paperwork to deal with, though he would rather be teaching the boys their potions.

As he entered the study, he stiffened. There was something off, he could sense it. Sighing, he closed his eyes briefly. When he reopened them, they glittered with Mage Sight. He saw the interweaving magics, and could easily pick out which one was whose. His was a silver-green, and it was connected to nearly every surface and area of the room. Draco's was green-white, and it hovered over the books he was allowed to read, as well as the seats he had sat upon over the last few weeks.

Harry's, however, was red-black-gold, signaling untapped potential. It was in the same places Draco's was, except for one place. It was in and around Severus' desk, though not as strong as if it had been touched physically. Severus growled under his breath, and turned off the Mage Sight.

Once the room appeared to his eyes normally, he stalked over to his desk, and began searching it. He found everything there that belonged to him. He then noticed something missing: one of the knives he had confiscated early into Harry's stay with him.

With a groan, he leaned back into his chair, trying to think of what he was going to do. Draco obviously didn't know that his BondMate was cutting again, or he would have come to Severus immediately. Which meant that Harry had not only figured out how to block his friend, but also had been down here last night, perhaps early in the morning. That would explain why the boy was sleeping in that day.

Sighing again, he shook off his retrospection. He needed to figure out what he was going to do. He couldn't allow the boy to continue cutting, less it drive the child crazy. But how was he going to stop it, when it was obvious confiscation didn't work?

He then realized what he had to do, as loathe as he was to swallow his pride. He wrote out a quick note to Draco, telling him that he would be back before the Potions lesson. He then got up and grabbed a handful of Floo powder from his mantle. Throwing it into the fire, he stepped into the green flames, calling out his destination.

He closed his eyes briefly, waiting for the spinning to stop. When he sensed it slowing down, he stepped carefully out from the fire. Looking about, he noted the two people he wanted to talk to were sitting pretty much in front of him. Heading over to the table, he said "Lupin, Black, I need to talk to you. It's about Harry."

Both men looked at Severus in surprise. Indeed, Black's jaw had nearly hit the table. Lupin, realizing that it was dire if Severus came to talk to them himself, said "Take a seat, Severus." When he did, Lupin summoned a cup of Turkish coffee and two butterbeers. He handed Black one of the butterbeers, keeping one for himself, and sliding Severus his coffee.

"Now, Severus, what is the problem?" Lupin asked softly. He braced himself, ready for anything; though he did wish that they had something stronger than butterbeer in the house. His wolfness was telling him that he was going to need it, as there was no way to be prepared for everything.

(End Author's note: Okay, that's the end of that chapter. For those that ask: Yes, this is a side story to Runner, as I had said in the previous chapter or in the summary. Please R&R.)


	3. Two Lions and a Snake

_(Author's note: So I'm a little late, sorry. Happy busy Spring Semester. Without further ado, on we go)_

_Last time:_

_"Now, Severus, what is the problem?" Lupin asked softly. He braced himself, ready for anything; though he did wish that they had something stronger than butterbeer in the house. His wolfness was telling him that he was going to need it, as there was no way to be prepared for everything._

Sirius watched Snape surreptitiously, his light brown eyes noting the strained look within the Potion Master's face. He had noticed that the man had seemed particularly stressed, and concerned about something. The fact that Snape would ask them, of all people, for help, resonated an ill feeling within the Animagus.

For him to ask for help from his childhood nemeses, meant that something bad had happened. The fact that it was Harry, Snape wished to talk about, confirmed his suspicion that something terrible had happened. However, it couldn't have been an emergency situation; otherwise Snape wouldn't have come through. He would have called upon them from the grate, and then pulled back.

Still, he had never seen the other man look so fretful, though he hid it well. It was mostly around the eyes, which weren't their normal black pits, but glittered. There was also some scowl lines between his eyebrows…and why was he noticing all these physical details? He wasn't into Snape, or any male for that matter, that way!

He drew himself back to the almost non-existent conversation, noting that Snape seemed to have finally braced himself enough to speak. He refrained from speaking, figuring that it was hard enough for the other man to talk about any problems. His wait was rewarded when Snape began to speak in that deep baritone of his.

"Harry is not coping as well as we had hoped, and is repressing his nightmares and his Link to Draco," said the Potion Master. Sirius was confused, but noticed that Moony had stiffened beside him. However this Link to the Malfoy scion worked, to repress it wasn't a good thing. Then Snape continued "Correction, he isn't repressing the Link, so much as blocking any negative emotions from getting through. Otherwise, I would have been aware that Harry had been up at around one o'clock this morning, rummaging in my desk drawer."

That was when Remus spoke up "How could Harry get away with that? You _always_ have an alarm spell set to your desk, let alone the drawers!" Sirius glanced between the two, and wondered at why they both seemed so grim. So the kid had managed to surpass an alarm, so what? Alarm spells were finicky at best, and any strong wizard could silence it before it woke the creator.

Severus negated his thoughts almost immediately as he stated "The alarm spells had never been touched, either to dismantle them, or because they were triggered. Somehow, Harry by-passed all the security measures, and managed to get back one of two objects that I had confiscated from him earlier in the summer." Sirius felt confusion, but noticed that Remus looked grim. What could the old bat have taken that caused such a reaction?

He truly wanted to ask what the sour faces were about, but he knew better than to say anything that would make him look stupid. He may not be the brightest crayon, but he did learn eventually. Instead, he watched his long-time friend, waiting patiently for some kind of answer. His wait wasn't long, as Remus began to gather his thoughts, getting ready to speak.

"You mean to tell me that Harry has gotten a hold of his ritual daggers?" Remus asked in a disbelieving voice. Snape held up a single finger, and the tawny-haired man murmured, "Dagger, then, a single dagger. Well, how do you suppose we stop him?"

Sirius still looked blank: ritual daggers were only for performing blood magic, something that he knew Harry could not do, what with the restriction on underage magic and all. He said quietly, "I hate to sound stupid, but what is there to stop concerning my godson?" Remus glanced at him, bemused, and even Snape only looked slightly condescending instead of out-right sneering at him. The matter had to be serious for that to happen.

It wasn't Remus, but Severus who answered, "Harry will go mad, if we don't stop him. You see, the daggers aren't for a magic ritual, but a…cutting one." Sirius continued to look blank for a bit, glancing at his old friend for a clue. Moony simply rolled up a single sleeve, and Padfoot's eyes widened. He understood now, and he gave his whole-hearted agreement that they had to stop Harry. The three men proceeded to get down to the business of how best to prevent their cub from going mad.

(End Author's note: This has taken me forever, and I still have a couple weeks left in the semester. To my Reviewers: please be patient with me. As my longtime fans know, I am a depressive college student. And this story in particular is a little too real for me. Please R&R, and look forward to the next chapter in Shattered Confidence.)


	4. A Brother's Worry

(Author's note: So, this is Chapter 4, and this is the last author's note I am giving until I have finished the series. Without further ado, on we go!)

Draco grumbled softly, sitting in a chair he had summoned in Harry's room. He glanced at the clock, saw it read 9:55, and huffed under his breath. He had started having some suspicions about what had happened last night once he saw the note that his godfather had left for him. The shielded mind of his BondMate only confirmed his suspicions. This was the first time that Harry had completely blocked him off since they had found their Animagus forms together, and it was both frustrating and worrying. Draco decided that it was time to give Harry a telling off.

Draco stayed quiet as Harry stirred, the clock reading 10 AM on the dot. He knew that Harry would sense him before fully waking up, so he wasn't too concerned about startling him. However, he also didn't want Harry to run off, so he shielded his purpose before his Bond partner would pick it up. He gave a half-grin when Harry glared at him after opening his eyes; the other teen didn't even have his glasses on yet!

"I assume there is a reason you are sitting there, staring at me while I sleep?" Harry asked in a dry tone. Draco snorted softly, and waited for his BondMate to put his glasses on before answering. Despite the seriousness of the situation, he could also see the humor as well. He was glad for that, as it would make talking to Harry easier.

"Good morning to you too, sunshine," Draco said in an equally dry tone. That got another glare from Harry, and a chuckle from him. Draco then decided it was pointless to beat around the bush anymore, and got down to the business of why he was there. He asked softly, "Why are you blocking me, Harry? Why are you risking madness?" He saw his friend tense, and his face saddened further. It seemed as if the other still did not trust him, despite everything.

Draco knew that he had overstepped the bounds, though, when Harry gave him a cold look and got up to leave. He said "Harry, please, don't walk away from this. I'm concerned for you!" His words were for naught, though, as the other boy walked out of the door to get breakfast. Draco sighed, and rubbed his temples in irritation. _That went well_ he thought sarcastically.

Deciding that he couldn't allow Harry to ignore this, Draco followed his BondMate down to the kitchen. He waited until the other had finished eating, before confronting him again. For a half hour he continued trying to get Harry to talk, before the other boy snapped "Will you just drop it, Ivory?! Why can't you just accept the fact that I didn't want to wake you, and forgot to take the shields down!?"

Draco looked taken aback, at first, then hissed in return "Because, Onyx, you would have removed the block as soon as I confronted you about it! Instead, you've spent most of the time since you woke up avoiding me!" Harry glared at him, and stalked off to the study to read up on the potions that they would be working on that day. Draco sighed, and followed, suppressing further irritation in favor of reading. He knew that the other boy would continue avoiding the issue until he had no option but to talk about it.

Draco winced slightly on occasion as he read, feeling his own frustration being echoed back at him along the link. Either Harry was also feeling frustrated, or that damned block of his was acting like a rubber ball. It was disturbing to say the least, and making it very hard for him to concentrate on his reading. Instead, he took to looking at his BondMate over the edge of his book, contemplating on how to get him to reveal the reason he was blocking him.

That was the tableau Severus, Remus and Sirius Flooed into: one boy staring at the other, while the other did his best to ignore the eyes that were upon him. All three of them knew that the next few hours were going to be the most trying any of them had experienced, and that was without taking into consideration Draco's reaction. For once the boy found out the reason he was being blocked, they had a suspicion that he was going to blow a gasket. Severus wondered if he had enough Calming Draughts to last them through the day.


	5. Author's Note: Story is up for Adoption

To my fans: I'm sorry. I hate to do this, but I can no longer work with this story. For those of you who are long time followers, you know that I am a depressive. This story isn't making it easier for me, especially as it feels like an obligation story. So, from this point on, January, 23, 2014, I declare Addiction of Another Sort up for adoption. Please send me a private message and/or e-mail with a sample paragraph if you wish to take up the daunting task of this story.

Requirements for paragraph: It must be 4 full sentences or more. It must be your idea of what will happen next in the story. And it must be from Remus' PoV. Third person is preferable, but first person is accepted.

If my e-mail is not available through my profile, contact me through either fanfiction or P&S depending on where you are reading this. Again, I am sorry to my fans, but I really want to move on to one of my other stories.


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